To Learn it, Love it, and Live it

Learning through trial, as we have been taught, is part of our earthly existence. Turning to the scriptures one particular day I came across Alma 32. The people here have been kicked out of their synagogues and "they are despised of all men because of their poverty.." They turned to Alma for help and guidance. What I read next touched my heart.

"And now when Alma heard this, he turned him about, his face immediately towards {them}, and he beheld with great joy; for he beheld that their afflictions had truly humbled them, and that they were in a preparation to hear the word."

In my feeling of despair, sorrow, and sadness I felt I could relate to the people Alma was teaching. What truck me was the response Alma gave them. He was filled with joy! He knew that when we are truly humble, it is then and only then, that we are teachable. We learn the word of God when we are humble and willing. Learning all I could about what the Lord could teach me through this trial had suddenly brought more joy to my days.

I soon realized that the more I learned the more I loved. At times, as crazy as it sounds, I loved the trial. I was loving that I felt the spirit more, I was loving that I appreciated my family more, and I loved myself more. How is it possible that in the middle of heartache, I can feel so much love?

In a talk given by President Dieter F. Uchtdorf titled, The Love of God, he says "When we truly understand what it means to love as Jesus Christ loves us, the confusion clears and our priorities align. Our walk as disciples of Christ becomes more joyful. Our lives take on new meaning. Our relationship with our Heavenly Father becomes more profound. Obedience becomes a joy rather than a burden."

As I felt the love of Christ it was as though He was standing against the wind on those days I didn't think I could bare it. Through the Love of Christ I had clarity on days that started out with heavy fog. His Love was saving me.

In Moroni 7:47 it says, "But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him."

Another big part to Love it is serving those around us, even in the midst of our trials. It was when I crawled out of my hole and thought about others or gave service that I felt better, and for that brief moment I forgot about my own hardship.

President Monson's talk this last conference, titled What Have I Done for Someone Today, said in reference to the scripture Luke 9:24, "I believe the Savior is telling us that unless we lose ourselves in service to others, there is little purpose to our own lives. Those who live only for themselves eventually shrivel up and figuratively lose their lives, while those who lose themselves in service to others grow and flourish—and in effect save their lives."

After trying to learn all I did, and trying to love more fully, I was finding it hard to actually LIVE it. When we feel temporary relief from our trials, do we continue to learn and love like we did in the middle of it? How easy is it to enjoy the free feeling that we just start coasting through life again? I realized that my true test was, do I LIVE what I have LEARNED?

I stopped looking at life as just getting through the trials the best I can, one to the next. Or taking in deep breaths while all is well, and then holding it when life feels like it's falling apart. I found that no matter what may come my way, if I continue to learn all I can about the Savior and follow Him, and continue to increase my love in all things. It is then that I am truly living life. What comes my way, bad or good, it is just another opportunity to grow. I don't mean to make it sound simple and I know that many suffer more than I ever have. I know the Lord only allows us to experience what he knows we can overcome. I feel the Lord has stretched me this year more than ever before. I have felt more pain than ever before and I have felt more alone than ever before. I know it's not easy, I can say however, that I am just beginning to feel some gratitude for what I have been allowed to experience along the way. May this year bring more learning of Gods word, loving and serving those around me, and living life with joy throughout it all.

A few family pics

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KENNA-BOO

WOW, I remember 12 years ago today waiting impatiently to see what this long awaited little girl would look like! Aaron and I were so anxious to be parents and could not have been more blessed to have McKenna come first. I remember looking on the computer for baby names. I liked Makayla and Mckenzie, and then remembered one of my favorite movies growing up, Somewhere In Time with Christopher Reeve and Jane Seymore. I loved Elise McKenna.

She was so elegant and kind and beautiful. She glided as she walked and well, I just loved her. I waited to see my little girl and feel of her spirit and once I did I knew she was a McKenna.

She is full of grace and beauty and walks with angels. I could not be more happy with who this young woman is becoming. She teaches me everyday to be a better person.

She is a GREAT babysitter and loves little a children. She has been such a good older sister and cousin (or as we like to call her aunt mckenna)

She has been an animal lover from the beginning. Once we had 5 cats because she would not let us turn away a stray. It just reflects her nurturing spirit.

She loves to have fun, try new things and is a DADDY'S girl all the way

I know that there are going to be days ahead where she is going to get a bit emotional...

And I know that when the storm comes...

..and I try to be there to comfort her, give advise and direction that she is going to just give me that look....

.....and she will insist that she climb this one on her own......

...and I'm going to have to let her go......

But she will always be my ray of light and baby girl.

Happy Birthday my Miss McKenna- you are my grace.

....with attitude!

Booty all around

Last night Jaron and I were singing songs before he went to sleep and I started singing Love at Home. This is what I heard come out of Jarons mouth, "there is booty all around, when there's love at home" I died laughing.

If I died today.....

I am just now winding down for the day. I know- it's already into the next one.But I'm laying in bed and for the first time letting out a big, ahhhhhh. It was a very busy day of house cleaning. I am amazed at how a short and fast weekend can bring about such disaster. But as I write I am waiting on my 12th and final load of laundry to dry. sheeeze

Needless to say I had more than the usual alone time with my thoughts. This can be dangerous. Today I was thinking to myself. "what if I died today?" Now I know that this question can come to mind at different times in our life. When we have just experienced a death of a loved one or acquaintance, we think about their life and the legacy they left behind. We ask ourselves what legacy will I leave behind after I pass on? But today I was not thinking along those lines. No, it was a bit more shallow than that.

I was wondering what if I died today, and my loved ones had to come clean out my stuff, I would have people in my house, in my domain. What would they find. Would they think " oh good heavens she was a lousy housewife, look at this junk under her bed." or, "well I had no idea she kept such an untidy underwear drawer." What about all clutter in my closet? And, I know this one is over the top but, would my legs and armpits be shaved? Seriously I can not be left alone with my thoughts I know. But I can't be the only one who's thought about this. Can I?

Well I can say that if I die in my sleep tonight, then I would still have junk under my bed. I just hate getting under there. I did not have time to dust, too much laundry. I really do have too many shoes in my closet and I was just too tired to shave today. But my laundry is done. :)

Captain Underpants!!

Being that Jack Jack is the last child, and I know how this potty training thing can go down sometimes, I have been in NO rush to even remotely contemplate the idea. However, Jack Jack is nothing like any of my other children. He will pee in his diaper one time and then walk around like he has a load in his pants wanting me to take his diaper off. Of course I wont until he at least pee's in it so much its about to fall off from the sheer weight of it.

He has actually been using the toilet the last couple months on his own accord. I have actually discouraged it. I know, I'm nuts. But he sees all the kids doing it so he has been pooping in the toilet whenever he feels like it. Which is the real reason I have been so hesitant with him. Jackson is my most stubborn child, he will not do anything unless HE wants to do it. And I would not put it past this child to be completely potty trained for a month straight and then decide one day that he doesn't want to anymore and then that's that. Seriously- he is sooo this way.

He will sit in a time out for, and I'm not kidding, almost 2 hours because I am making him say sorry to me. He won't do it because I am telling him to. So he will sit there and refuse to say it until HE wants to. Once, it had been like 45 minutes and he really wanted to get up, I told him he could as soon as he said "OK Mommy". He wouldn't do it. I looked at him and said, "Jack, why wont you just say Ok mommy?" he throws his little hands up in the air and says, "I don't know". Another 30 min. and finally he looks at me and says it. "OK Mommy" with a huge smirk on his face. He's one stubborn kid.

So, my little Jack Jack has decided that he wants to wear big boy underwear and we have gone two days completely trained. I have not had to tell him when to go, I have not had to stay home all day, he stays dry for naps. It's like a dream potty training experience. However I know better and a couple weeks from now he will have changed his mind.

Oh well

I keep putting off my blog because I want to get a new family picture, new pic of all the kids, yada yada. Not happening, so Oh well, I am just going to have to live with it. Too much is passing me by, I'm so way behind.

First of all, my sister and I are getting back into posting recipes and things on or SAS blog. It not only is so fun and I love finding new information and tips for preparedness, but it's so nice to have all my favorite recipes in one place. It is also keeping my sisters and I in touch better. One thing we will all have in common no matter how old we are, how far apart we live, or how mad we might get at each other- Pickett girls love to eat! So thank you Dad!

A little catch up:

Braelynn and Jackson are so much alike it's scary. The only difference is their gender!

In fact, this is totally what BraeLnn looked like at this age. The girls did this to Jack Jack while I was out. When I came home and saw him I flipped out as to how much he reminded me of Braelynn.

McKenna is going to be in YW this year. WOW, where in the heck does the time go? She is amazingly mature and such a good girl. She is doing do well in school, we just feel so blessed that she is having a positive experience in middle school, so far! Oh, and she has a cell phone! We decided to reward her NOW for her good behavior and teach her the right usage of a phone. At least while she is still listening to what we have to say! And now we have something to take away for misbehavior! It's a prepaid phone and she pays for it, all by herself! If she doesn't have the money, then the phone doesn't work! LOVE IT. It's funny because we will call her and she'll get mad at us because we are "wasting her minutes"- LOL

Jaron is doing so well in school this year. He is reading and writing and really loves it. This Christmas he was given some board games and now that's all he wants to do- "who wants to play me in a board game?" he yells through the house. Thing is no one wants to anymore because he whoops us all silly!

One night he and I stayed up playing the game sliders. It was so fun and we both come from the same competitive blood that we were getting ugly! He would win and make a big scene, then i would win and of course have to rub it in his little 6 year old face. I have no shame.

He is a blast. All he wants to do with Aaron is wrestle and play the wii together :)

They had a fun Halloween- it was fun to make up the girls costumes. Mckenna wore my wedding dress (and fit into it pretty darn good, holy cow) BraeLynn was an old lady- so funny. Jackson fit in to Jarons old Thomas the Train costume, which he looked adorable in. All the houses we went to the people could not get enough of him. He got WAY more candy then the other kids! It helped that he would go up to them and say, "choo choo" as he held out his little bag! Jaron was batman for I think the 3rd year in a row!

The kids love to ride the horses, Jackson fearless and wont let me help. Crazy kid.

He takes the couch pillows off and jumps all over. He does this every day. ugg And I had to duct tape his diaper on him because he kept taking it off. He thought it was funny,

I have even had to duct tape him to the chair because he flooded our bathroom and i was so mad it was do that or throw him out the window. I have a pic of that on the other computer-

I have been doing a few wedding cakes this year. I love to do them, I just freak out so much and have nightmares that they wont like them- It stresses me out. But I love doing it. Maybe I will get to do more this year. I really need the practice.

Aaron is doing better with the business transition and I think we might be over the worst if it. But we are prepared for anything! As long as it moves us forward- That's the most important thing, as long as we are moving forward and progressing, no one can stop us!

When I grow Up....

The kids learned a song from their Aunt Brandi in which they sing quite frequently. The words go " when I grow up, I want to be a Mother, and have a family, one little, two little, three little babies in my home....(later in the song)...and I will give them cookies and milk, and yellow balloons" One day Braelynn was singing the song and paused in the middle of it and says "Mom, your not a real mom because you never give up yellow balloons and cookies and milk."

SO, I had planned to do this for them for quite a while and decided to surprise them after school with a ton of yellow balloons and cookies and milk. It was fun. I have decided that I will have "YELLOW BALLOON DAY" at least once a year to remind them that I AM a real Mom!

It really was interesting to see how balloons really just made the kids happy- Jaron was the happiest :)

"MMMOOOOMMMMMMMMMMM"

Jackson is in a bed now- which means he can get up anytime he wants, well ok he did that in the crib too, but it's a more quiet process now. That is until I hear "MMMMOOOOOOMMMMMM" being yelled from downstairs at the top of his lungs. He gets the stool to turn on the light

And then waits here until I come feed him.

He's just a skater boy

My kids love that song by Avril Lavine. Anyway, Jaron has taken up skate boarding and is crazy nuts with it. He is already doing tricks and wants to have to gear. My kids dont really do the "I have to have" thing. It makes it nice when they really do show interest in something and take it so seriously! All day yesterday he wanted me to just come out on the lawn and watch his tricks. Aaron and I took the boys to the skate park in Louisville, they were so fun to watch. However we forgot Jarons helmet so he was not allowed to do any tricks. That didnt stop Jackson from trying to throw himself over the edge!

Oh BOY

The other day my oven went out- ummm yeah, very bad considering just how much I use it. I mean, literally I am baking every day. I would call a repair man but it would cost way too much since this is a kitchen aid- so Aaron has to try and fix it. He starts taking the whole thing apart as I start to hyperventilate. This is my baby, and its sitting in my kitchen all torn apart like this: and yes the black things on the side, ARE THE SIDE of my poor oven

And this is our new dog. Isabelle or IZZY as we call her. She is a 2 yr old shih tzu and we love her. I was NOT waning a dog and more so not an inside dog. A friend in my ward needed a place for her and felt prompted to ask us. She talked to Aaron first, which we all know he can't say no. The kids overheard and well, yadda yadda yadda- as soon as she brought her over I was hooked. She is darling and LOVES the kids. She loves me more because she is at my feet non stop. As I was considering this I asked he kids to pray about how what they feel the dog will add to our family. I knew I couldn't just ask them to pray if we should get the dog- not sure they understand the "thy will be done Lord" attitude yet. So I thought they should think about what she will add after telling them all the stress I thought it would add!

McKenna's was the one that got me. She said it will bring comfort to our home. I knew when I saw the dog that this is why it was right. The last year or so has been a rough one and I know the kids have felt some of that. I know that Izzy has brought them comfort lately. It's neat how the Lord looks after his little ones.

Jaron and I went to Heuber Farms for his field trip the other day and had a good time. I was in charge of five boys (heaven help me) and was put with another father to "chaperone". More like run around with our heads cut off.

Jarons teacher introduced us and we were on our way. As we were going on the tour, him chasing one half of the boys, me chasing the other- I kept hearing "Ann, Ann". I would ignore for that is not my name, right? Well, I heard it again and turned around to see Tom (the other chaperone) waving me down. Now I do have hearing loss so I thought to myself I must have heard him wrong. oops, so I responded . Well then he was much closer and again, "Ann, Ann?" Ok, now I knew that he was calling me the wrong name. So what do I say? "yes?"

Yeah, that's right, I responded to Ann THE WHOLE DAY. It was so funny because he would call me and I'd catch myself thinking, "oh yeah, that's me." So we finally get the kids on the bus and we shake hands wiping the sweat of our brow in relief we are FREE- and he says" so nice to meet you Ann" I just giggle to myself and responded the same.

Now WHY on earth could I not have corrected him in the beginning? I am seriously weird.

Jackson's new thing is to such his thumb while using his nostril as a pace holder for his finger. And this is all he wants to wear because its his cars Jammie's. But sometimes he has issues. And this is what can NEVER GET LOST- Thomas the train or "choo choo" is on daily at our house. Jackson is totally into trains it's so great. Alright, that's the latest. Oh, and I am on dairy and wheat free diet. I have been seeing a nutritionist for my eczema lately. It was getting worse and I was at my wits end. It has been hard to try and find the root of my issues but I think I am getting close. But dairy sets my eczema off like crazy. So I have been cooking different and its SOOOO hard to eat like this on a budget. But I have to - no choice so I have had to get creative. It's a good thing I can eat almost anything. Needless to say stress is the biggest factor in all this flare up but who knows when that will ever go away- ha, so until them I am back to yoga every day (dvd in my living room) and eating differently. I will try to put up recipes on the SAS blog when I can. It is more a vegetarian way of eating. But I like that.